0 Flares 0 Flares ×

It has to be one of the best movies ever…for those of you who have never seen ‘Say Anything’, drop your bologna sandwich and go rent it. Lloyd Dobler is the quintessential good guy and I can’t think of a single woman who has seen the movie and NOT fallen in love with him.

Most of us have certain movies that resonate really well with us and send us into deep thought. ‘Say Anything’ is one of those for me. Lloyd Dobler is the man I always wanted to be. He’s confident, likable, fun to be around, and ends up with the girl. Most importantly though, he’s a good person. No, make that a great person (hopefully you got the movie reference).

Most of us strive to be better people, although all the hate, greed, and crime in the world doesn’t make it easy. I can honestly say that I have a lot of work to do on myself. My life has worn me down so thin that I have turned into a pessimistic, humorless, and self centered person. Not exactly the message I want to send to my daughters.

So, taking a lesson from Lloyd Dobler, here are 5 qualities that he has, I need, and we all can benefit from having:

  • Being Carefree. I’m not talking about blowing off my responsibilities and leaving my kids to fend for themselves. I’m talking about being relaxed and content. I am neither of these things, not by a long shot. I hope I’m not the only one out there like this, but I can’t relax! Even on my last vacation to the beach, I spent the whole week tense and anxious. My reasoning: how can I relax when I’m so unhappy with where my life is?
  • Being Positive. We all know that thinking negatively has a devastating affect on performance, success, and pretty much everything else. Focusing on the good things in my life has to start sometime. “We become what we think about” is a famous saying and it’s so true. Given my pessimism, I suppose I shouldn’t be too surprised that I am where I am right now. It’s not that difficult to think of all the things that we do have, but many of us focus on the bad.
  • Not Caring What Others Think. If you ask someone if they care what others think of them, most will say no. Ask that same person to stand up in a crowded restaurant and sing Justin Bieber’s latest song, you’ll find out quick that they’re full of it. It’s human nature to care what others think of us, but most of us care waaaay to much. If you are one of the people who actually don’t care what others think, then one of the following things is true:
  • You are a sociopath.
  • You don’t give a shit about people, period.
  • You’ve worked very hard at getting over the fear of being laughed at and humiliated.

Back in 1997, I went through a personal growth workshop called LifeSpring. For one of the exercises, we were asked to choose something we were very uncomfortable with and then put yourself right in the middle of it.

For my exercise (or stretch, as they called it), I made myself walk into a busy McDonald’s at lunch time and started preaching from the Bible while standing on a chair. It sounds crazy, but after the initial panic, I relaxed and realized that it wasn’t so bad.

Everyone thought I was a complete idiot and it didn’t matter. I learned a lot from that exercise and I felt really good afterwards. Years have now passed and I’ve reverted quite a bit, but I am working on it.

Getting way out of your comfort zone is a great way to experience personal growth.

  • Being Completely Honest. Let’s face it, most of are full of shit. We all put on facades of how we want to portray ourselves in order to get “fill in the blank” (respect, admiration, confidence, etc.). It all starts with being honest with yourself. I struggle with this all the time. I try to convince myself things are a certain way because of this or that. I often just need to look at myself for my failures and mistakes but I don’t. Once you can learn to be completely honest with yourself, excuses dry up and disappear.

Being honest with others is THE best way to build any business. I see so many Internet marketers who are trying to make a buck with misleading and often untruthful information. This may make you a few bucks in the short-term, but it will catch up with you. Be upfront and honest with everyone and your business will prosper.

  • Having A Definite Goal. Lloyd Dobler’s one goal was to take Diane Court out. If you know the movie, then you know that he didn’t just want to take her out, he decided that he was going to take her out. He persisted, got rejected, and yet still took her out.  Once you decide that you are going to do something and make that commitment, powerful things begin to happen. Wishing for things doesn’t cut it. Decide on a clear goal, decide to make it happen, and begin working towards it immediately.

Here are 3 of my favorites Say Anything quotes, all of which relate to me….

  • “I’m looking for a dare to be great situation”
  • “How hard is it to decide to be in a good mood and be in a good mood once in a while”?
  • “You MUST chill, you MUST chill”
Want More Ass Kicking?
Join Us!
Instantly download "Your Guide To Cutting Through The Bullshit and Getting What You Want" for FREE by clicking "I'm Ready!"