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Today marks the fourth anniversary that I have been at my current job <insert loud sigh followed by several minutes of weeping openly>.

Now, four years may not seem like a long time, but when you hate your job more than you hate anything else in this world, it’s a VERY long time.

To be honest, I feel like I’ve been working here for a decade. It’s like I’m serving a prison sentence and my parole date has not been determined.

Time has slowed to a crawl as I sit staring at my computer all day, longing for the day I can be free.

Gone are the days of waking up with excitement. Gone are the days of being happy at work. Gone are the days that I gave a shit about what I do for a living.

I’m not writing this post to complain or get your sympathy. No, I am writing this as a warning. A warning to all those people who are doing exactly what I am doing. Waking up every day in order to “do your time” at a job.

This is not what life is all about.

Better Days Behind Me

There once was a time when I actually cared about my profession! Yep, it’s true..

My first few years in the financial services business were not what I would classify as enjoyable by any means, but they were at least interesting. I also had a much better boss who ended up becoming a very close friend.

I can remember walking into my office, and by office I mean a 4×4 cubicle, and being excited about what the day held in store for me. It’s hard to imagine that now, because I know exactly what my day is going to look like now. <insert loud, uncontrollable sobbing>

My office at that time was filled with a group of twenty somethings looking to make it in the cut throat world of finance. We would make sales calls all day and then go out for happy hour afterwards. Good times.

Having coworkers who we actually like and want to be around is paramount. Days go by much quicker and the workplace becomes much more palatable when you have friends in the office. Yea, it was pretty good back then…

Bad Days Are Here

Like I said, these past four years have been excruciating. Each day I show up for work is one less day of life I have left. Do you know the feeling?

You are probably asking yourself why I have endured all these years of suffering. Why is he doing this to himself? Isn’t life all about choices? Can’t he just choose a better job and a better life?

The answer of course is yes. Any self help guru will tell you that making your life better is as easy as making a decision to change. I know, I’ve read plenty of books on the subject and firmly believe that to be true.

If it were that easy though, everyone would be doing it and nobody would be buying those books. The problem is that very few people are doing it and they are selling millions of books.

While it’s not easy to turn your life around, become a happier person, and have a whole new outlook on life, it can be done. It has to be done!

The silver lining in all of this is that I have come away knowing that I am not meant to be an employee, much less an employee in my current firm. I know now what my future holds and it does not include my job.

Odd as this may sound, I spent years trying to convince myself that I was going to be a financial advisor for the rest of my life. You know, have a huge practice, earn a mid six-figure income, drive a BMW, take as much time as I needed off, the list goes on and on…

Do I want all those things? Sure. But I have finally made the decision that I am not willing to sacrifice any more of my happiness to get it. I know in my heart that it’s not the right thing for me.

Better Days Ahead

Looking ahead, I see good things for me. I see a world where I don’t have to report to a miserable boss or spend countless hours preparing financial plans.

I also see a world where I am able to provide for my family through my online business(es). This is an exciting thought, a thought that keeps me awake many nights.

You see, without dreams/goals/passions or whatever you want to call them, we are dead!

If it weren’t for my vision of an incredibly successful blog, I’m not sure how much longer I could last at my job. I know I’ve said this many times and in many of my posts, but my job really is killing me.

Ask yourself, how long could you last in a job that you absolutely hated? Try to think of the worst possible job that you could realistically have and then imagine working there for years, feeling like you could not quit.

Would you snap? Would you walk out? Would you forget about your responsibilities and make a run at happiness? What would you do?

I know my answer, what’s yours?

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