Why Your Personality Is Killing Your Blog
Jan

Our blogs are distinct representations of us, in every sense of the word. They tell the world what we’re like, what’s on our minds, and what are goals are.
In my constant search for great information, I have come across many a blog that offered interesting information, yet was lacking in one very important thing. Personality.
Granted, all blogs are not designed to be personal, but these are what I am referring to here.
There can be any number of things that makes your blog blend in with all the noise on the Web, but there are a few things that are instant deal breakers. Translation-0:00 time spent on site.
Your Blog Design Sucks
This is one of my biggest pet peeves when it comes to the world of blogging. When I come across a blog that looks like a 3rd grader designed it in the dark, it really annoys me. I mean, how hard is it to find a decent looking free theme? There are thousands of them online and it only takes a few minutes to test drive them.
If you want your readers to have a good experience, why wouldn’t you spend time finding an aesthetically pleasing theme? After all, most of us will only get one shot at a reader. If they are put off by anything they see, they probably will never come back. Reader lost!
Your blog tells the world who you are and what you’re all about. If there is nothing there but plain old text and not much else, what does that tell your readers? What does it say about you?
I’m not saying that you need to go out and hire a designer, spend a bunch of money, and come up with a brilliant design. What I am saying is that you should try to put some degree of effort in making your blog as presentable as possible.
Personally, I am completely turned off by a poor blog design. I won’t usually even get to the content if the theme is hideous or there are ads strewn all over the place.
This is not to say that plain Jane websites can’t be successful. Take StevePavlina.com for example. His site is very plain and boring, yet he has a massive following because of his outstanding content.
Now, if you can write as well as he does, then you’re excused from bettering your design. If not, it may be wise to try to find some ways to create a better visual experience for your readers.
Your Blog Looks Like An Advertisement Parking Lot
This drives me crazy. I see so many blogs that are relatively new, have a handful of posts, and like 35 ads all over the fucking place. It’s ridiculous. There is very little chance that this strategy (if you can call it one) will pay off.
I call it the “dump and pray”. It’s when someone just dumps random banner ads, text link ads, Google AdSense Ads, and sidebar ads in every nook on their blog and there is no rhyme or reason to any of it. Then they pray that people find their site and click on their stuff. Hmmmm.
Having quality advertisements is a viable and ethical way to generate passive income…for some. If you have a high traffic blog and can find suitable advertisers that want to pay you to promote their stuff, that’s great. However, starting a blog on Monday and plastering crap ads up and down it on Tuesday is a joke, not to mention a waste of space.
Your Posts Put People To Sleep
If your blog is about waterfalls, massages, or mattresses, then you’re exempt. If not and you tend to write posts that bore people into falling asleep in the middle of your 2,500 word article about pencil erasers, then it’s time to change things up a bit.
People have ultra short attention spans and if you don’t have a captivating headline AND content, there is a very good chance that you will lose your reader. Losing a reader is the last thing you want, so it makes sense to make some adjustments.
I am certainly far from the be all end all captivating writing wizard, but I do put a lot of effort into making my posts somewhat entertaining if nothing else.
For a few good examples of blogs that WILL captivate you, check out the following:
- SiteSketch101
- SmartPassiveIncome
- BlogTyrant
- TheMiddleFingerProject
- Sensophy
- IlluminatedMind
Building Relationships Takes Personality
Blogging is all about building good relationships. Nobody wants to associate with a robot, so it’s unfortunate that many so bloggers add little or no personality to their sites.
I’ve listened to dozens of Podcast interviews and it amazes me when the interviewee sounds like Data from Star Trek. Absolutely no personality and completely monotone. Building a blog takes networking and networking is all about people. If you have no people skills, how can you effectively network?
Just about anyone can write an article, but that doesn’t mean anything. The key to keeping your reader and wanting them to come back is YOU!
Even if you don’t think so, you do have a unique style and there is at least one person in the world that will find that style to be incredibly awesome (even if it is your Mom).
So, loosen up those tight pants and relax! Have fun, enjoy yourself, and write from the heart. It will make a HUGE difference in how people respond to your blog.
If you are naturally an asshole, then I say go with it. If you have a clearly defined voice, even if it’s being a complete ass, then that’s who you should be online as well. For example, JohnnyBTruant comes across as an arrogant prick who doesn’t seem to give a shit about what people think.
This is exactly what makes him so popular. He isn’t hiding the fact that he is an ass, he is embracing it. And guess what? It works! His blog gets tons of traffic and he has a great business going.
As a side note, I don’t talk shit about people behind their backs, so I want to share the actual Twitter message I had sent Johnny a few weeks ago.
All I’m trying to say here is that we all need to express ourselves through our writing, our design, and our persona’s. Be yourself and I truly believe you will be more successful.

Laura F
I’ve been writing in print for so long, that the only way I knew how to write was in a detached authoritative way. What I like about blogging is that I can be more human, and I can a present myself as a human instead of an article on a page.
It’s hard sometimes when I’m writing a page to make things more personable, but I’ve found that the posts where I’m snarky or funny are the easiest to write and the ones that people respond to the most.
Now design, on the other hand, is my nemesis…
Steve
Laura,
It seems that the more real you are with people and open in your writing, the better people respond. I think people really like to connect with the author and when that happens, they tend to become loyal readers.
As far as your design, I would have to agree….you need to add some flavor on there, more colors, things that grab our attention, etc.
If you need any suggestions, let me know 🙂
IamDavid
I agree with the blog design part so much, and the content and the personality issues. No one starts out a revolutionariy though, it does take time to figure this medium out. Great observations!
Steve
David,
I understand that bloggers don’t start off as pros, but everyone starts with their own personality. If you don’t have a personality (or a shitty one), then it makes things much more difficult..
IamDavid
Hey Steve,
What I meant was that whenever you are really new at something, like blogging for example, you tend to try and “be like” something or someone. You copy because you don’t know what you are doing. It’s how most start out at anything.
That is what I meant by revolutionary. Only after you have been at it for a while will you develop your own authentic style and voice…which leads to your point about personality. Once you got your style it is either sink or swim based on personality.
Anyways, interesting discussion and points brought up by Ash. It might be because of the traffic from Dumb Little Man is akin to different topics than what is on your blog. Like if Zen Habits all of a sudden started swearing (which would be awesome..just kidding) 🙂
I enjoy what you are doing. Keep it up!
-David
Steve
David,
You have a good point. It is difficult in the beginning to find your voice and your style, but you will aways have your personality. It seems like too many bloggers are either afraid or unsure of how to use their unique personality on their blogs and the result is an average and often boring site.
I haven’t figured out the type of person coming from DLM yet, because it gets so much traffic. I think you should send Leo from Zen Habits an email suggesting he start dropping F bombs!
Cool blog by the way!
Judy Helfand
Your points are well taken. I only have one question and this is based on reading a number of your posts. I sincerely hope you do not take this the wrong way: are expletives a big part of your personality? You see, you are a great writer and your goal, as I understand it, is to find a way to do something you love, make a good living, and be able to spend a lot of time with your wife and children. What if someone you respect happened upon your blog, was taken by your creativity, and wanted to consider you for a project or long term position, BUT felt nervous about some of your language.
Let me share a story with you. Expletives have been a part of my personality for many years. Let’s face it, they do get someone’s attention. When a person already knows you…it can work wonders. Enough said, you get my point. Anyway, a few years back I was a Senior Business Analyst and Project Manager in the IT department of a fairly large property and casualty insurance company. 90% of the 4000 employees worked with green “dumb” terminals. They logged into the main frames…the company decided after 2000 to bring all of the employees into the 21st century with PCs, email, internet, web-based software…etc. I was put in charge of the project. Keep in mind, some locations needed to be re-wired both with more electricty, as well as T-1s to handle the load. Server farms needed to be built, 3500+ emails created. The deployment was done in stages, by location, required travel for my team, and many of these employees had never used a mouse or been on the internet and those that were not challenged just thought this was a great opportunity to surf the net, try to download stuff (even though we had it pretty tight). During one of the deployments we experienced a problem with connectivity. A young man came to me and complained about something, I went to his desk and inquired as to what he was attempting to do…which was not good and he explained: “well, I do this at home all the time!” I was so upset, I said to him “I don’t give a _uc_ what you do at home, you are here to work and you will follow our guidelines!” Not very appropriate, but colorful. HE REPORTED ME TO HIS MANAGER! But no one ever told me. A memo went into my very pristine employee file…and it sat there, UNTIL a year went by and by then we had a new IT VP. My review period arrived. I was told I would not be rated as excellent because of the incident…when I questioned why they had never told me about the complaint, they could not give me an answer. To which I said: “I am not signing the review and you can keep the 4% pay increase!…and you will never hear another expletive out of my mouth.” PS: They gave me the raise, I never signed the review and I watched my language for the rest of my tenure, which lasted another 3-4 years.
I know this is a long comment, and I hope you don’t take offense. Maybe you can give me some feedback.
Wishing you a good weekend.
Steve
Well Judy, you definitely have my vote for the longest comment I’ve ever seen 🙂
I appreciate your time with this and you have an interesting point. I am, by nature, not a person who swears a whole lot. I am around it quite a bit, but don’t really use it mainly because I don’t want my children to hear those things.
I do feel however, that it has a place in writing and it tends to make some points a lot more powerful. My blog is all about passion and I am very passionate about what I am writing. I try to make strong points here and there and think the use of off color language intensifies many of these points.
I realize that I may turn some folks off, but I have come to understand that you can’t please everyone.
As far as your personal story, I appreciate you sharing it with me. However, I would have handled that in a much different manner, so I can’t say I resonate with your point.
I respect your opinion and have appreciated the advice you have offered me in the past.
Thanks again and I look forward to seeing you around soon….
Jacob Sokol
haha!
Patricia@lavenderuses
Hi Steve
You make some salient and relevant points in this post. Unique content, good blog design( mine has just had a makeover and I’m so happy with the result) and all this is good.
However, although I see bloggers say they use bad language on their blog cos that is them expressing themselves; I wonder how well their traffic is doing? Sure people will visit initially but will they come back?! There will be exceptions to the rule and I know those who cuss will quote them….but that to me does not justify it imo.
I was at a biz meetup only this week and we were discussing this very topic. We agreed that it was inappropriate. And some of my blogging buddies who are successful marketers admit that offline they may use it but never online.
They said they respected their readers/potential customers too much to even think of using these words on their site. these are not just successful bloggers, they actually market and earn their living online.
I accept the “my blog, my rules” that is doing the rounds of the blogosphere, but one thing I would suggest that if we want to attract people to our blog and get them back, we need to decide early on the type of visitor we are trying to attract. Just my 2 cents 😉
Patricia Perth Australia
Steve
Patricia,
I have no idea if my infrequent use of foul language is putting people off. Just your comment and one other have mentioned it, so I’m not too sure if it’s a turn off.
I think a lot of my readers are people who are very unhappy with their job, life, or something else and misery brings negativity. Cursing is negative and seems like so many people use it when letting off steam. My blog is letting off steam.
I’m not trying to defend the choice of my words here, but simply letting you know where I stand.
Does the use of bad language on my blog bother you enough to stop you from returning? I know you’ve been here a number of times and this is your first mention of it.
Thanks and by the way, the new design of your blog does look very nice 🙂
Judy Helfand
Steve,
I got up early this morning, as I have a post I want to write. Saw Patricia’s comment and your response to her and me. Two things for sure, Patricia’s comments lended viable credibility to my comment and her new design is lovely to the eye…I bookmarked it and will return to learn more, although my life in the desert does not allow for too much lavender!
Thank you for noting the length of my comment. My habit of commenting and telling a story is precisely how my personal blog came into being. Someone on blog chat suggested that my comments were worth a blog of their own. So be it. My personal blog is not a great design, which I know as I was experimenting with Blogger’s new templates. I will clean it up in the next few weeks.
How would you have handled my review situation? Keep in mind, I spared you some details. I went directly to the SVP of Claims and verified the validity of the complaint…actually reminded her of her own use of salty language, and finally met with the IT VP mentioned before and when I realized he was trying to set me up, the chess game changed. Believe me he was gone in a few months, but the note stayed in my file. I never burned my bridges with this company…because that is a lesson I learned long ago.
Anyway, enough about me. This is what I am trying to determine about you and your blog. I understand that it is about letting off steam, but that is not your goal. Is it? It might be a means to your goal. Could it be you have another business plan and another on-line business you are building?
You see, Steve, for some crazy reason I feel passionate about your desire to break away from the corporate world, tear down the cubicle walls, pack up your things and spend great days with your family. What would you do if some one in your present company came upon your blog and decided he/she would help you quit your job? Is this a reasonable question?
This I know about life. You never know who is going to walk into the room and you never know which door is leading to the stage.
Now, my friend…I need to get back to work.
Judy
Steve
Judy,
After your and Patricia’s comments (and now another), I had to ask myself if I needed to add profanity to my posts. I don’t plan on changing my style, but am thinking about how this might affect my readers. I had honestly never thought about the consequences. So, thanks both of you for bringing it to my attention.
As far as how I would have handled the situation differently, I probably have made my case as strong as possible about how ridiculous the complaint was and how we are all adults. I also would have not conceded and stopped using profanity at all. I’m not saying this would have resulted in a better outcome, because I may have gotten myself fired. The problem I have always had is that I am a lousy employee. Meaning, I hate everything about being one.
Although you were in a corporate environment, swearing is a part of life. It’s everywhere and although I rarely use it in conversations, I think it is just part of life.
My goal for the blog is not simply to let off steam, it’s about resonating with people, getting them to understand that there is a better way to live, and taking action on it. I do not have any other online businesses either. All my energy is going into this one.
I’m not sure I understand your last question about someone helping me quit my job. Can you clarify that?
Thanks for the support and your caring, it means a lot.
-Steve
Judy Helfand
Steve,
Sorry for the delay. Got busy, then went to a movie. If you get a chance see “Country Strong”.
Point of clarification. My employer, the insurance company, had an employee policy which specifically addressed the use of expletives. Namely, they were not to be used when interacting with co-workers during normal business! They had me.
Now about someone helping you “quit”. Think about what you would do, if on Monday morning you went to the office and your boss came to you with a printed copy of one of your posts and said: “Steve, it seems you are not happy here so we have decided to let you go.” Do you see what I am saying?
Language is powerful. Use it wisely. Manage it, so that it does not manage you.
We will talk more. Let me know how your twitter survey turns out.
Judy
Steve
Ok Judy,
I didn’t realize that you’re employer had such a clause. That changes things.
I have thought about what would happen if my boss read this blog (and I’m reminded all the time by my wife). I most likely would get fired. Here’s how I look at it:
1. It would be the best thing that ever happened to me (after we got foreclosed on of course)
2. It would be really difficult financially and would wreak havoc on my marriage, but I am thinking of the long-term here.
3. I am throwing caution to the wind, which may not be the smartest thing I’ve ever done, but I truly believe in what I’m doing here.
Tariq - The Vantage Journey
Hi Steve,
I like all your points about how much personality determines the success of a blog.
From your experience and knowledge in blogging, how would we know whether our personality is the main reason to the slow traffic of our blog?
Steve
Tariq,
It hard to gauge if your personality is affecting your traffic. I think you need to know who your target audience is and then you will have a better understanding of what type of personality they respond to.
Read your comments carefully to see the types of responses you are getting. For example, Sensophy.com is written by a young guy, Jacob, with a “what’s up dude” attitude. He has plenty of personality, but if his audience was 45 year old business men, they might not get it and be turned off.
What I was specifically talking about in the post though was blogs that offer nothing to the public. There are boring articles, few photos, and nothing out of the ordinary. How can anyone expect to become successful online without standing out? We are competing with hundreds of millions of sites and blogs.
Glenn
Well, this is my first visit, and I could not believe it when I came across your expletive.
I really was thinking “I’ll not be bookmarking this” although I was enjoying what I had seen so far.
I arrived from your DumbLittleMan post, which I enjoyed enough to follow you here.
I don’t know what to do now…do I “vote with my visits” (or lack of them), or do I revisit, to see if you take on board the comments made by Judy and Patricia…
Glenn
I will quote your comment above…
“After all, most of us will only get one shot at a reader. If they are put off by anything they see, they probably will never come back. Reader lost!”
Steve
Glenn,
I’m sorry that you did not appreciate the language and I do not wish to lose you as a potential reader. But in all honesty, I write from the heart and if a “bad” word comes out from time to time, I am not going to worry that someone will take offense. I know I can’t please everyone, so I hope you understand this.
Thanks for the feedback.
-Steve
Steve
Glenn,
Thanks for the comment. I’m not sure of what to make of your “I couldn’t believe the expletive” comment.
1. You don’t know me so how can you be shocked by my language?
2. We are adults and the use of profanity should not be a shock at all.
3. This is a personal blog, not the website for a Catholic Church.
I’m not knocking you, I just don’t get it.
I am VERY passionate about what I write about and sometimes I feel that using such language makes a better point.
Peggy Baron
Hi Steve,
I’m a big believer in adding your personality to your blog posts. In fact, I have “Don’t be boring!” in the back of my mind every time I write a post.
It’s a lot more fun to write like I talk; in a conversational manner using short paragraphs (hmmm, does one use paragraphs when one talks??)
Anyway, as a reader of blogs, I enjoy a bit of personality peeping through along with good info, and I really appreciate a sense of humor.
Thanks, Steve.
Peggy
Steve
Hey Peggy,
I can see you definitely add your unique style to your blog and it looks like it’s working!
I love to see blogs with a little flare…
Ash @ The Middle Finger Project
You boil down this blog, and you’ll fail.
The audience here isn’t the one you’re seeking.
Steve
Interesting viewpoint…Why do you say this isn’t my target audience? Who do you think is?
Ash @ The Middle Finger Project
My dear, you are on your way to kicking ass.
But think about it – would you want your ideal reader to be offended by you saying the word “fuck” once or twice? And then criticize you about it? (No offense, audience! I’m sure you guys are great, but you probably are looking for a different flavor.)
To figure out your ideal target audience, ask:
1. What kind of person do I REALLY want to help?
2. How is this person different from all of the other people who are sort of similar to that person?
When you get the right audience going, they’ll be excited and energized by everything you do–and the way you do it–rather than put off.
I can guarantee you that no one leaves comments like this on my site, and mine is called The Middle Finger Project, for god’s sake. lol. It takes some time to get going, but please don’t change who you are to appeal to one or two people who had an issue. Vanilla is death, man.
Steve
Ash,
Thanks for the encouraging words.
I hear what you’re saying about staying true to who I am. I have no intention of changing how I write, but rather am trying to get a better understanding of what my readers like/dislike. I know I will never please everyone.
I’m definitely trying to build an audience that I can interact with and hopefully help as well. It’s so hard to know who exactly I am appealing to and who I should try to attract. It seems like your audience would be a little more clear cut given the nature and tone of your blog (which is awesome by the way).
I appreciate the feedback and hope to hear from you again..
Keith
I couldn’t agree more Ash, in fact I say fuck the audience altogether! If they don’t like you, it won’t matter what you do or say, that won’t change a thing. If you are yourself, it doesn’t matter what “they” think or say, “they” can’t take away you being who you really are!
BTW Ash, just discovered your site thanks to Steve mentioning it, LOVE IT!
Ash @ The Middle Finger Project
Yeah, brotha!
Steve
Keith,
I don’t know if I would go as far as to say fuck them all, but I hear what you’re saying.
I plan on continuing writing in my own style and realize that some people will not like it. Hopefully, there will be more people that do like it than don’t!
TMFproject is a very cool blog! She is all about personality and I love it!
Dino Dogan
Hey Steve. I cought your exchange with Brankica and Nic on twitter so I decided to check out your blog.
First time here but I know I’ll be back. Nothing significant to add to the post itself, I agree with all the points you made so I just figured Id say hi and looking fwd to more great stuff.
Steve
Thanks for stopping by, Dino. Hope to see you around..
Jacob Sokol
Pure hilarity! “If your blog is about waterfalls, massages, or mattresses, then you’re exempt.” Thanx for the honorable mention!
Steve
You deserve the mention bro!
Harriet`
You really don’t mix your words do you! I agree with everything you’ve said here, and I think you’re going the right way about it as well, people need to be shouted at to get them to stand up and take notice! Well done.
Steve
Thanks Harriet, I’m just trying to be honest with people. Thanks for noticing..
Heather
Steve,
I completely agree with Ash saying, “When you get the right audience going, they’ll be excited and energized by everything you do–and the way you do it–rather than put off.” That’s why we read the blogs we do. It’s not what you say but, how you say it that counts most.
And, like Glenn, I was a little shocked when I read the expletive. I use them often in speech, but never, ever in my writing, so it surprised me. However, it struck me as bold – told me that you are obviously not afraid to be yourself, even if that upsets people. Kudos!!
I also followed the link from today’s Dumb Little Man post, which I loved. And, I’ve enjoyed looking around here. I will definitely be back.
Steve
Heather,
Thanks for the kind words! I am far from a potty mouth and rarely swear in conversations. Like I had mentioned, I feel that using profanity on occasion to make a strong point makes sense to me. If I upset some people, it’s unfortunate, but I am not going to change my style.
I’m glad to have you as a reader and hope to see you around.
Michael Hodson
Totally agree on letting your personality shine through. I am a snarky ass. Not sure I have as many readers as I would if I were more sunshine and “all travel is great,” but screw it. That’s not how I think and feel.
Steve
Michael,
You have a very cool blog there. I would love to have 1/100th of the adventure you have.
Not really sure what snarky means, but it’s a good thing that you’re not changing your writing so as to not offend people.
Good luck with the world travel!!
Ryan Renfrew @LifestyleDesign
Hey Steve,
Right on bro,
Definatly agree with you on all counts here. Personality is crucial. Because there is so much info avaliable out there on the web we are very selective where we get it from, personally I would like to get it from someone I like trust and respect, these values shine through personality.
bLAZE yOUR tRAIL
Steve
Ryan,
Trust and respect are invaluable for a blogger. Without them, it will be VERY hard to be successful. My thought is that if you don’t have a personality that can interest people, then go do something else. Hell, they can have my job……
Sally
Hmmm… I have conflicted feelings about this whole personality thing.
Yes, I think you should show your personality. Basically, personality is the only thing that brings readers to my blog — because, Lord knows, I don’t know a thing about SEO (like what it even stands for) and I don’t write posts that are even remotely helpful (unless, you really need to learn how to gain 10 pounds while living in Thailand for 3 months… in that case, I’m your girl!).
But you need to show your true personality. I’ve met a number of bloggers in person who don’t match up with their online personae. Usually they’re nicer, quieter, more insecure and basically more human than they come off in their bad ass blogs. But bad ass blogs get millions of readers and insecure, quiet girl blogs don’t (I know… I have one).
As you said: “If you are naturally an asshole, then I say go with it.” (Personally, I’m not really into reading asshole blogs, but, whatever, we all have our thing). But if you’re NOT an asshole (or a bad ass or a world conquerer or a fire eater or whatever it is you claim to be in your blog), then don’t pretend to be one.
Bruce
Man, some people get their knickers in a knot! It was just the odd f bomb after all. I’m a big boy, I can tune them out if I see them. So swear away, I wont give a crap.
For me, getting some personality in my posts comes pretty easy. I’m a lousy typist, but OK on my Voice Recognition software. When I’m just speaking, rather than carefully typing & formatting, it seems more natural, and I tend to think, more like the real me!
Of course I have to spend a fair bit of time cleaning it up before I hit ‘publish’.
Nice site, I came here from your guest post by Adrienne…
– Bruce
Steve
Bruce,
It was interesting to see the reactions I got from that post. I was pretty surprised that people were offended. I’ve learned that we can’t please everyone, so I’m not going to try.
Armand Polanski
Steve,
This ultimately helpful.
On Speaking of blog design:
I had a hard time looking for 1 cool looking free theme in wordpress took an hour or so and help from random friends. I ended up picking a minimalist look theme(White Background, Gray title letter,yellow orange link color).
I don’t know if it’s so much too ask but if you can pass by, give you critics on the look and feel of my site.
On Blog Post:
Your post reflect you current state when you were working on creating the article, I believe that if you were happy during that time, the post would have touch of happiness in it and the other way around.
On Blog Personality:
Blogs are like tv series, look for something that can wow them or interest them.