Fuck Off, Resistance
May

“Resistance cannot be seen, touched, heard, or smelled. But it can be felt. We experience it as an energy field radiating from a work in potential. It’s a repelling force. It’s negative. Its aim is to shove us away, distract us, prevent us from doing our work.”~Steven Pressfield, The War of Art.
Welcome to my life for the last two weeks.
Excuses. I’ve been full of fucking excuses every day. I woke up every morning for the last two weeks with the intention of setting the world on fire.
Damn it, I was going to write some of my best content ever last Monday. And on Tuesday I was going to finish my 3 overdue guest posts. Wednesday I was all set to put the finishing touches on my (now grossly overdue) eBook. Thursday I was going to write a whole new email auto responder series. And Friday..that was the day I was going to write the rest of the copy for my coaching program.
But those things didn’t quite happen.
Why? I can’t seem to sit my ass down, focus on writing, and just write.
“There’s a secret that real writers know that wannabe writers don’t, and the secret is this: It’s not the writing part that’s hard. What’s hard is sitting down to write. What keeps us from sitting down is Resistance.”
It would be much easier to let you believe that things are going great. That I’m writing every day, applying for freelance jobs, and building my business.
But my aim is not to mislead. I am struggling with writing, period. And when I do sit down to write, it takes all my willpower not to get up and do something else. Even writing this post has been difficult.
I think it’s a combination of 3 things:
- Shitty time management. The honest truth is that I have been conditioned since age 15 to be an employee. Reporting to a job Monday through Friday is all I’ve ever known and it’s damn hard to adjust to having complete control over my schedule. Yes, it would be safe to say that I’ve been institutionalized.
- Being overwhelmed. I have so many pressing things on my to-do list that it’s paralyzing me. Inaction has been a problem for me for a long time and although I am getting things done, it’s just not enough.
- I’m afraid of the unknown. It’s like I’m scared to unleash my inner power and show the world what I’m made of. It’s partly my fear of success coupled with not knowing what the future will bring.
“Are you paralyzed with fear? That’s a good sign. Fear is good. Like self-doubt, fear is an indicator. Fear tells us what we have to do. Remember one rule of thumb: the more scared we are of a work or calling, the more sure we can be that we have to do it.”
Excuses Are Shit
Now I could go on about how I was too preoccupied with my divorce testimony or how my mother flew into town to see my daughters after 3 years away, but these are simply excuses.
I could also tell you that I have too many things on my plate, am busy with my personal training business, or am freaking the fuck out about how I’m going to pay my bills next month. But these too, are just excuses.
It just comes down to doing the work.
I have the time. I have the place. I have the why. I have the ability.
I just need to write.
I actually feel like a slack ass because except for my personal training clients, I have my days wide open. I should be knocking out a metric ton of content each week, but I’m not.
And to add insult to injury, I recently heard an interview with Gary V where he was asked how many hours he puts in these days. His answer?
All of them.
Why aren’t I doing that?!?
Fucking Resistance..
Call it whatever you want. Writer’s block, procrastination, laziness, avoidance. I call it Resistance.
And I’ve found only one solution to getting over this. It’s not going to the gym for 2 hours, it’s not sending out Tweets, and it’s not reading Pat Flynn’s latest post (89k last month-holy shit!). It’s just forcing myself to sit my ass down to write.
A writer writes. And I’m a writer.
“Our job in this life is not to shape ourselves into some ideal we imagine we ought to be, but to find out who we already are and become it.”
I went days without typing a single word and I’m trying to make a living as a writer. I just didn’t “feel” like doing it. That’s all. I wasn’t inspired to write so I didn’t. I let “it” win.
Reading my own writing here makes this seem even more crazy because I have so many goals and aspirations for my online business. Not writing because I’m not feeling it? Sounds ridiculous. But I’ll tell you the Resistance creeps in and takes over your fucking mind and shuts down all progress. Seriously.
I’m sure many of you have experienced a similar situation where you knew you had to do something and just didn’t. You put it off by telling yourself you’ll do it later. And later turns into 3 days, then 6 days, then 2 weeks. Now you’re so far behind that the mere thought of getting it all done is debilitating. The result..you do nothing.
The Lesson
I don’t share this post with you to beat myself up. Its only purpose is to share a struggle, which I fear is extremely prevalent in the freelance/online entrepreneur world.
I hope you can learn what not to do if/when you have the chance to branch out on your own. I have no doubt that most if not all people in my situation face similar issues and I believe it’s part of a process that ultimately will lead to personal growth.
It’s a blessing and I feel extremely lucky to have the chance to work from home, do what I love, and get paid for it. It’s a once in a lifetime opportunity for me.
This quote says it all…
“We fear discovering that we are more than we think we are. More than our parents/children/teachers think we are. We fear that we actually possess the talent that our still, small voice tells us. That we actually have the guts, the perseverance, the capacity. We fear that we truly can steer our ship, plant our flag, reach our Promised Land. We fear this because, if it’s true, then we become estranged from all we know.”
Now I want to hear from you. How do you handle Resistance?

Ian
Awesome post man. I guess it’s safe to say that you’re now fully aware that being self employed and an entrepreneur isn’t all hugs and daisies, haha.
I absolutely used to struggle with what you’re describing. For me personally I’m constantly asking the question of myself “what is the ONE most important thing that I absolutely have to do NOW” and then simply taking action on that one thing, forcing myself to completely forget about the literally 97 other things that I could spend time on and still have it be “worth while”. I would encourage you to ask yourself that question on a regular basis during the day and then truly focus on that one thing with reckless abandon.
Stay uncomfortable my friend.
Steve
Ian, my man!
Thanks for reading, I appreciate it. I honestly thought that once I was on my own, I would be in control of everything, have time for massive amounts of work, and dominate the Internet. Not quite….
I have been using an iPhone app for MIT (most important tasks) that only allows for 3 things to be listed. That does help, but when I start thinking about ALL that I have to do, it shuts me down and sucks my creativity out.
I know you’ve had a great deal of success which has taken a ton of hard work and long hours. I’ll try your approach this week.
Steve Rice
Totally get where you are, Steve. I’m like you…in a place where I’m doing what I love, getting paid and for the first time, loving my career.
But yesterday, I was so bummed…I was scared. What if it doesn’t come together? What if another client doesn’t follow this one? What if I don’t have what it takes?
There are a couple of things that help me through resistance.
1. Stillness (the ego hates that)
2. Gratitude (i go on a gratitude walk or something…but I have to get where I can feel it in my body).
Practically, once I’m re-aligned internally, then I make sure I’m clear. I force myself to focus on one thing. I prioritize. I do it.
Clarity is key for me. When I’m clear and my values are aligned, then taking action is instinctive.
‘
But when I don’t trust myself, that’s when I find that I struggle with a lack of clarity and drive.
Steve
Steve,
You and I have a lot in common. I realize that being scared is a natural response, especially when we are pursuing what we love and have no idea if it will work. I do have faith in myself and know that I will one day be where I want. As far as stillness, I can honestly say that I NEVER do that. It would be excruciating for me to sit still for even 5 minutes.
Gratitude is another thing I struggle with. I get so wrapped up in my stuff I fail to recognize others. I’ve seen you grow a lot over the past few years and am glad you are finally in a the spot you want to be in your life.
Thanks for your words here, my friend.
Stephen
Steve,
I’ve written for 235 days in a row. The minimum I write is 50 words a day. This article was exactly me about 1.5 years ago.
The resistance is your subconscious mind. Writing isn’t a habit, and until it is, you’ll have that resistance. Because you’re aiming to do big things, you don’t have enough willpower to force yourself to do it. Occasionally, motivational spurts can get you over the hump, but long term, you’ll need a more consistent solution to make the behavior a habit.
I wrote a book about my solution above called Mini Habits, which is about requiring a ridiculously small minimum from yourself every day. Even if you’re “supposed” to write 20x your minimum, having that easy low bar gets you started, and once you start writing, “you’re in.” The greatest resistance is always before starting.
The best part is that over time, it will actually develop into a habit. Habits are formed only by consistency and time: quantity matters less.
I’m currently in the best shape of my life. Guess how that started: one push-up per day. 🙂
I’d be glad to send you a copy of Mini Habits if you’re interested. I know this frustration all too well and this is the only solution that works for me.
Stephen
I should note that while my writing minimum is 50 words a day, I average about 2,000 words per day. And after 200+ days, my resistance to writing is nonexistent.
In conclusion, if you can make writing a habit, you’ll be amazed! Good luck.
PS. I can relate with the fear of success. There’s definitely something to that.
Steve
Stephen,
You’re exactly right. The short-term motivation I feel from time to time is what is getting me by. I do seem to find inspiration at random times and in random things. Writing is NOT a habit I have cultivated yet and it’s killing my fledgling freelance business. I do know that I just have to sit and make myself write.
I am interested in reading your book, thanks! To be honest, I really struggle with my habits. I am very resistant to change and like things “my way”. Unfortunately, my way doesn’t work in many cases. I have to consciously remind myself to do positive things all the time and it’s not as easy as I would like.
Well done on the exercise too. I am actually getting in great shape as well. My goal is to be able to do one muscle-up by the end of summer..
Michaela Mitchell
You describe the thing that scares me the most about the plunge I’m about to take in 17 days – the strangling fear that will stop me from moving forward.
My hope is that the fear of being completely destitute will keep me moving forward. I guess if you need a more immediate goal, the poorhouse is a good one.
Steve
Michaela,
The fear of being homeless or dead broke is definitely a strong motivator, especially when you have no fallback plan. What is your plan going forward? How are you making the transition?
Bethany
My dad used to remind me, “How do you eat an elephant?”
Answer: “One bite at a time.”
Focusing on the whole elephant? Hell, yeah, that’ll weigh you down in good shape. But take a bite at a time and eventually you’ll see the end of your goal.
What kind of space do you write in? At home, in an office environment, or in a coffee shop/restaurant/whatever? Sometimes picking a spot outside of the house to serve as your “office,” your 4+ hour chunk of business time, can make all the difference. And if the place doesn’t have Wifi? So much the better. Unplug that shit unless you actually need it — and there are programs out there that’ll blacklist time-sucking websites for as long as you need them to.
One of my favorite things to do is put on headphones and block out the world while I write like the wind. Try a single focus — don’t multitask.
My latest issues with resistance is getting my marketing materials designed. I’m not good with design — I would love to have something unique and elegant and that’ll stand out, but I don’t have the time and resources at the moment. And while I’d love for them to be absolutely perfect before they go to print… having something /done/ is more important than having them perfect. I can make do with 50 rack cards that I can change up later — but I can’t exactly advertise my new biz with 0 rack cards, you know? (That’s my current marketing material of choice, so, yeah, I’m dependent on having at least some of those to start with. 😉 )
So, baby steps. Little bites. I’m getting there, slowly but surely, and I’m hoping to have them ready to go by the end of the week. I know that I /have/ to get shit done, because there’s nobody else that’s going to do it for me.
I’ll be over here rooting for you in your resistance against the resistance!
Steve
Hey there Bethany!
I have definitely been trying to eat the whole elephant and it’s obviously not working. My issue is not the space I work in but rather jumping from thing to thing. It’s like I get ADD when I get online. I want to read, write, post, Tweet, and 10 other things all at once. I like doing multiple things at once but it just isn’t working for me.
You have a good point about having something done rather than waiting until everything is perfect. I am guilty of that for sure. And yes, all responsibility falls on us and there isn’t a person out there who will do it for us. I appreciate your support and am saying “fuck you” to this damn resistance!
Bethany
Oohhh, yeah, I hear ya — my adult ADD is running rampant these days. 😛 I try to work for a few minutes, do something fun for a few minutes, then go back to work — trying to keep everything even. Sometimes I do more playing than working, but I’m getting there.
Things are slowly starting to fall into place. Now to go out and get the clients!
Steve
I can definitely understand that, Bethany! It’s not easy to manage time properly especially when we haven’t had to do it ever..
Keep at it and start getting some damn clients!!
Evan
We aren’t really afraid of the unknown. We are afraid of the fantasies that we fill it with.
When we become aware of these fantasies we have useful material to reflect on.
Resistance is information. Focusing on overcoming it can ignore important information.
Steve
Interesting take, Evan. I agree that the fear associated with the unknown is far worse than the reality of it. This is new territory for me and there is a lot at stake. Of course I’m fearful of what might happen but I have to keep pushing forward.
David Griffiths
Hi Steve
Thank you for the insightful post and for me, a preemptive kick up the ass – this is something that I fear when I finally End the Grind in July. I am sure that I will experience this at some point in my writing career when working for myself and I will always remember this article.
All the best.
David Griffiths (founder of Work For Work’s Sake).
Steve
David,
Good to hear from you again. I’m looking forward to hearing about your journey and if you need anything, let me know and I’ll help if I can.