Viva Las Vegas And The Winds Of Change
Oct

Aaaah, where to begin? I’ve been laying low for the last few weeks, mainly because I was in Las Vegas, but have also been sorting my thoughts and trying to make sense of everything that’s happened with my blog.
While in Vegas, I thought it would be a great opportunity to reflect on my situation and gain some clarity. As it turns out, Vegas is pretty fucking distracting. Who would have thunk it?!?
The only thing I managed to accomplish while out there was getting my pocket queens cracked on the river by some jackass with 10-6 off suit in a no-limit hold em tournament.
My “vacation” turned out to be more of a hindrance to my progress here, but at least I got to spend some quality time with the king of the penny slots, my father…
Oh yea, did I mention that I almost soiled myself on the flight home as my plane was being tossed around by a shitload of turbulence. Did I mention I HATE FLYING?!?
Back To Life…Back To Reality
Upon my return, I was welcomed back to reality with a swift kick in the nuts. As much as I love my wife and kids, it’s a rude awakening going from sitting in casino’s all day and watching Cirque du Soleil acrobat freaks fly through the air to the constant screaming, whining, and crying.
And that was just from me….
I’ve had virtually zero free time since I got back on Saturday and have been feeling all stressed out about getting some thoughts on paper here. Fine, it’s not paper, but you know what I mean.
I’ve listened to my interview a few more times and have been poring through my comments in search of answers. And as you know (and I do now), the answers are not there. They have to come from me.
And that’s what I’m working on right now…
Yes, I’m Still Talking About THE Interview
As many of you know, my blog (and business) was turned upside down (and kicked down a flight of stairs) in a brief 36 minute conversation with Penelope Trunk.
As many of you also know, I have decided to make some big changes around here and am actually attempt to create a real live business.
The kick in the ass by Penelope (and most of you) was exactly what I needed and I’m very excited about the future. With that excitement also comes a load of fear. Since I made the decision to shift from fun hobby to serious business, I’ve been feeling the stress of having to produce.
And I haven’t even produced anything yet…
I still have so many thoughts and ideas in my head and am even more overwhelmed than when I wasn’t creating anything at all!
I am so overwhelmed by all the possible directions I could go in that I am paralyzed by inaction. I haven’t written at all since my last post and it was very hard for me to even start this post.
Facing Fear
I never really had any fear about my future as a blogger until I started looking at this solely as a business. I had no obligation to post, no obligation to meet any goals, no obligation to produce a single thing.
And it was nice…
And it’s also why I was where I was. Just a guy with a cool blog, a decent amount of traffic, some awesome readers, and no income.
The fear I feel now is new to me. It’s the fear ofΒ HAVING to produce, the fear of letting everyone down if I cant live up to their expectations, the fear of falling short of my own expectations, the fear of being accountable to thousands of readers.
This is scary shit!
The good news is that I know this is temporary and once I get my head out of my ass, things will start clicking.
Ok, So What Have I Done??
Believe it or not, I actually did get a few things done over the last 2 weeks. The first thing I did was listen to Penelope’s interview again…and again. And then I reread all the comments for the post. That’s about 250 of them and approximately 35,000 words!
I actually pulled 10 questions from the interview, all of which I could turn into a post of their own.
You might want to ask yourselves these same questions as I think they will really open up your eyes.I will address all these questions in detail in future posts, but here they are:
- How do I truly want to spend my work day? What do I want to do with my time?
- How much money do I need to create to quit my job?
- What are my strengths and how can I best use them in a business?
- What are my weaknesses and how can I make them an asset instead of a liability?
- Why am I refusing to set a real goal? What am I afraid of?
- Am I really building something or just escaping reality?
- What should I really be focusing on with my business?
- Do I need to walk in someone’s shoes in order to follow in their footsteps?
- Am I lying to myself about what I want or what I am doing?
- Am I committed to actually creating a business or committed to having pipe dreams?
There are really powerful questions and ones that have had me second guessing my motives. For example, I never thought that I was trying to escape reality by blogging. It never crossed my mind.
After the conversation though, I realized that I was in fact doing just that. I was losing myself in a hobby I loved and avoiding some of the pressing issues I have like working on my marriage, dealing with a daughter with behavioral problems, and coping with the stress of never having any fucking money.
This is heavy shit here and millions of us are knee deep in it. Which brings me to my next point.
Life is meant to be enjoyed
I believe this will my heart and soul. Are you really, truly enjoying your life? Neither am I.
What I learned is that it’s not just about quitting a miserable job and doing something that fulfills you. Certainly that’s part of it, but there are so many other areas of our lives that are suffering.
Our society is at a breaking point and if we don’t change things, were going to be sucked into a black hole of depression, ill health, and misery.
My BIG Idea!
So I’ve been thinking about this for a while and it was brought to the forefront by the interview. As much as I hate my job and want to get out of it, it’s just one small piece of my puzzle. There are a number of areas in my life that are not fulfilling and it has to change.
If it doesn’t, I believe I will eventually die a miserable, lonely, and broke old man. And I can’t let that happen. Not for my wife, not for my daughters, and not for me.
What I’d like to write about is change. Not a little tweak here and there, but rather dramatic, life altering change.
I look at the most important things in my life and they look like this:
- Family
- Health
- Financial stability
- Personal relationships
- Faith
I’d say these are pretty important things for most people. Well, I can tell you that I’m living at about a 3 with all of them right now and want to be at a 10.
I don’t know if I’ll have the next Tony Robbins turn around story, but I do know that in order to have a more exciting, vivacious, fulfilling life, I need to work very, very hard at all these things.
Are you looking at your life right now as well? Good.
My goal is to change my life in all these areas and become a better man. A better father. A better husband. A Better friend. A better leader. A better role model.
I’ve thought about this hard and I realized that if I quit my job tomorrow, my life would still suck. It would suck much less, but it would still suck.
That’s a harsh reality for me and maybe for you as well. Quitting a shitty job isn’t the answer to our problems. It’s becoming the person we know (or don’t yet know) we can be.
We need to look deep into our souls to find the type of person we have become and if we don’t like it, then we need to change it. Or not.
I could easily drift through life doing what I’m doing. Collecting a paycheck, avoiding any real decisions, not challenging the status quo, merely existing. After all, isn’t that what were told to do? Isn’t that what most of us do?
Fuck that.
Finding Your “Why”
In order to become the person you want to be and live an extraordinary life, we need to find our “why”. I understand that being extraordinary has different meanings for different people. For some, it’s being able to teach children how to read and for others it’s having more time with their children.
And yet for others, like me, it’s about living a life that you LOVE. Being happy with where you are in life, being madly in love with your spouse, having the freedom to have lunch with your first grader at school, being in control of how you spend your precious hours, feeling vibrant and alive, being healthy, active, and energetic.
Is this too much to ask? If you think so, then you are wrong. Dead wrong. So how do I know it’s possible if I’ve never had these things?
Because I believe I can. That’s it.
If you’re struggling with why it’s so important to find your “why”, take a few minutes to watch this talk from Simon Sinek at a TED conference. One of my readers, Todd Pettee, sent the link to me and I’m so glad he did. This is a very motivating video!
What I Want
What I want out of life is everything. What do I plan to give in order to get it? Everything as well.
Will it come easy? Will it come quick? Of course not or I would already have done it. It’s going to be brutally difficult in a sense that I will have to reinvent myself each and every day.
Where I would normally make a decision, I will need to think twice about how it will affect my life. Will I succeed? I honestly don’t know.
This is a huge order to fill and as easy as it is to write, it’s going to be the hardest thing I’ll ever do. I’ll need to reprogram my entire way of thinking about things. My entire outlook on every aspect of my life will need to be questioned.
Why am I doing this you might ask? Certainly nobody is going to turn their life around in such a complete manner. It’s just too hard with all of life’s challenges, right?
I don’t care about any of that.What I care about is the value of life and I place a very high value on mine.
What I care about is using the rest of my life (now almost half over) and becoming the best Steve Roy I can be. And yes, that does include quitting my job. π
Believe it or not, I am a realist. I realize that I cannot do this alone. I have little idea of how I am going to accomplish all of this, how it’s going to look, and how’s it’s even going to be possible. But I know that I’m going to try as hard as I can to make it my reality.
And I need your help. I need your support. And I need you to care. That’s all.

Justin | Personal Growth
Welcome back from Vegas Steve. Are you any richer?
I began to notice real change in my life when I began to voice my personal values. I voiced them on my blog, to my family, friends, neighbors and strangers.
Values set the compass for the direction that we want to go in. I value having financial abundance, time, freedom and so on.
Steve
Thanks Justin,
I am officially less richer than I was when I started. Why did I play the slots? So stupid…
Your values sound a lot like mine and I’ll be working double time to live the life I want.
Ruth - The Freelance Writing Blog
Wow…now this is some heavy stuff. And I think you may have had an epiphany in Vegas! Blogging, your job…in fact your professional life, is just one small part of the equation.
Life is meant to be enjoyed, certainly some of the time, perhaps most of the time, but you will never, ever, ever (in my opinion) escape the range of experience and the subsequent emotion that this roller coaster journey presents.
You will face setbacks and challenges (I had one failed marriage; I have a daughter with Down syndrome; I’ve had jobs that I hated; relationships that have pissed me off BEYOND; friends that have betrayed me; loved ones who have fallen ill and even passed away). And you will have joys (I love my husband dearly; I have five incredible children; I have been around the world; my friends are blessings in my life; I am enjoying wonderful health and I currently love my work).
I think that the ultimate key, Steve, is to find equanimity in the face of fluctuating emotion. That’s what’s worked for me.
It’s going to sound fringe – but I found it in a daily Ashtanga yoga practice. It grounds me. No matter what is happening in my life. It has taught me to breathe through the feeling, observe it, detach from it and then go through the motions that I know to be right and good. You need to find what grounds you as a starting point.
Anyways…I’m off topic. But I don’t believe you will ever find eternal, consistent joy and happiness. Life isn’t about fairies and rainbows and unyielding sparks of light. But that doesn’t mean that it can’t kick ass!
Steve
Ruth!
This was a pretty heavy post and I wasn’t sure how people would react. I’m actually a little disappointed that there only a few comments, but I know it’s all part of blogging.
I probably have no idea what I’m getting myself into by taking on this personal challenge, but I willing to go for it anyway!
Equanimity in the face of fluctuating emotion. Great thought although I’ve never come close to feeling it. Certainly something I will be striving for though.I’ve heard from many people that yoga has that kind of effect, but I personally don’t have the patience for it. Maybe I ought to give it another try…
I think I do know what grounds me and that’s being in Boulder Colorado, enjoying the peace there and being part of the beauty of it. Best place EVER!
Not going to happen for me anytime soon though.
Thanks for this!
Ross Murker
First: It took a LOT of fortitude to post the podcast of your conversation with Penelope – I respectfully salute you for that.
Second: although a bit abrasive, she called you on some things – if you *don’t* have a well-defined plan, a set of smaller (think “Kaizen” sized) and intermediate (3-month, 6-month) goals leading to the life you need and deserve to live, then you’re probably supporting someone else’s dreams, someone who DOES have those goals, and probably will stay that way until you make those changes.
(An offer: I’ve written an article, “The Process of Progress”, I’d be more than happy to share with your readers for the cost of proper attribution)
A couple of books I’d recommend: “The Passion Test”, by Janet Bray Attwood & Chris Attwood, and “Loving What Is” by Byron Katie – The first helped me find my real passions, the second has “The Work” that has helped me toward clearing the way for them.
Steve
Ross,
You’re absolutely right about supporting someone else’s dreams and not my own. I’ve done that my whole life and now that I’m 40, I cannot do that any longer. I’m working on my goals and will be posting them here soon for all to see. As far as your offer, I’m no longer using guest posts. Is that what you had in mind?
Thanks for the suggestions on the books. I’ve gotten quite a few recommendations in the comments and my reading list is getting out of control!
John Garrett
Hey Steve!
I’m glad you had some “vegas time” for yourself.
It feels like you are on the right path here. Your writing really conveys the determination you feel.
Setting goals is always a bit scary since you then introduce the possibility of failure, but I feel it definitely makes you stronger for reaching and sticking to those goals.
You’re on the track for sure, you can’t just keep waiting for something to change, you’re going to change things yourself, even if it’s not overnight. I’ll be keeping up with you to see where this goes!
Steve
Hey John,
I’m definitely determined and am totally fired up about what I’m doing here. I only hope that others are going to be interested as well. I’m definitely scared of failing, but not because I will look bad or lose face. My fear is that I will never get out oft he grind and will never come close to living my full potential. After all, how many of us really do?
It’s easy to write about how I’m going to make epic life changes, but only time will tell if I can stay focused and committed. Thanks for being part of this!
Todd Pettee
Steve, I love what you’ve written here! Thanks for sharing your thoughts and struggles so openly. My favorite part of your post here is this…
“Iβve thought about this hard and I realized that if I quit my job tomorrow, my life would still suck. It would suck much less, but it would still suck.
Thatβs a harsh reality for me and maybe for you as well. Quitting a shitty job isnβt the answer to our problems. Itβs becoming the person we know (or donβt yet know) we can be.”
Your exactly right! Sometimes we focus on external things–like money–that we believe will solve our problems, when in reality, the problem lies within our own hearts and minds.
I think a lot of the dissatisfaction we have in our lives comes from our expectations of what brings us happiness. And in a sense, it’s not our fault. We’re constantly bombarded by messages from the media about how to be happy. We’re told that, “If you just have this car or house, then you’ll be happy. If you just make this amount of money, or live in this town, you’ll be happy.”
I’m sorry, but that’s not a recipe for happiness, that’s a recipe for failure, dissapointment and depression. The crazy thing is, we never take the time to sit down and define our own desires and figure out what REALLY makes us happy.
But I’ve found that there’s a way to distance ourselves from this destructive pattern. And it’s easier than you think. The biggest life-changing event for me, and my family, was when we decided to get rid of our TV 3 years ago. That one, single decision has COMPLETELY changed our whole family in a way that I will never forget.
We no longer have that ever-present distraction in our lives telling us how to think, talk, act, live and be happy. It’s changed our relationships, our financial situation, our physical health, our way of thinking, our lifestyle. And guess what… We’re happier!
Your post here is so inspiring because it seems that you’re discovering that happiness is found within. You’re struggling and learning so much about yourself and life in the process. You’re asking the difficult questions and searching until you find real answers. And that’s where you find the change that will bring you to where you want to be.
Thanks for the mention! I’m really glad that video struck a chord with you, as it did me. It’s such a clear and simple explanation of how we should operate on all levels of life. We should first understand the, “why” and then the, “what” and “how” will become very clear.
Keep searching and ALWAYS listen to your heart. Happiness is found by being YOU!
Steve
Todd,
That sentence was the most profound for me as well. I didn’t even realize I wrote it until it was in front of me. I never thought of it like that before, but it’s so true. I believe we have to find what makes us truly happiest and work towards making that a permanent part of our lives. Money won’t make us happy. Toys won’t make us happy. It’s the freedom and control we can have over our lives that can make us happy. Choosing to spend our time doing things that excite us is what it’s all about.
I can’t imagine no tv in my house! It’s not that I watch it much, but my wife and kids would be distraught. Who knows though, maybe they would be open to it someday?!? I can see how it rots our brains and fills our heads with garbage.
I wouldn’t say that I’ve had an epiphany or anything but I have started asking myself the hard questions and for once, answering them honestly. Just quitting my job is not the answer I am looking for. It’s part of the process but there is so much more I need to work on. I envision myself helping others who are struggling with similar issues become better people as well and to find their happiness. That’s what I want.
Thanks for your support..
Stephen Smith
I am so glad that you delved so deeply into this. You sound like you have made quite a breakthrough and should be proud. Now, take your own advice and do write posts about each of the questions that you mined:
How do I truly want to spend my work day? What do I want to do with my time?
How much money do I need to create to quit my job?
What are my strengths and how can I best use them in a business?
What are my weaknesses and how can I make them an asset instead of a liability?
Why am I refusing to set a real goal? What am I afraid of?
Am I really building something or just escaping reality?
What should I really be focusing on with my business?
Do I need to walk in someoneβs shoes in order to follow in their footsteps?
Am I lying to myself about what I want or what I am doing?
Am I committed to actually creating a business or committed to having pipe dreams?
Write down your answers (and share them if you want), but use them to continue exploring your next steps.
In the meantime take on some freelance work and save some money wherever you can. You can do this.
Steve
Hi Stephen,
Taking on those questions is one of my goals for sure. There are just so many directions I can take this blog right now, I don’t even know where to start.
I like your suggestion as well. I am working on building some small income streams right now and will be sharing those soon!
Lis Sowerbutts
I’ve read a few of your posts since I came to your site after someone posted THAT interview on a forum.
You sound like me, a few years ago, I started my linked blog as an online journal – I’m a great procrastinator so putting stuff up on my blog makes me more accountable.
But the blog has never been my core business. That’s because I nearly quit -several times – because I was following the so-called A-list bloggers. Now that was about 3 years ago and some of them still be around (I recognise some of the names on your interviews list) – its a fake business model – which I think you are starting to understand.
Yes the first movers in the industry – e.g. problogger make a good income by teaching others to blog.
But that’s not how most of us make money online. Its not how the big players make money online.
Pat from SPI – he never aimed to make money from SPI – don’t follow what he does on that blog – look at his niche sites – that’s where the money is.
Blogging about blogging doesn’t make money for 99% of people, because frankly the market is not big enough.
The big niches are the same ones you can see in real-world advertising: fashion, beauty, travel, gadgets.
You’re in financial services – you are far more likely to be able to monetize some of that real world knowledge that you have than I did (my real job is being a geologist!). Don’t you think there is a huge demand at the moment from people wanting to learn how to live within their means?
Steve
Hi Lis,
I agree that most of us will never make money directly from our blogs and think that teaching people how to make money online is incredibly saturated. Although Pat has 8 niche sites, 98% of his income comes directly from his blog via affiliate links. I personally have little interest in that model, but it works for him because of the trust he has built.
I am planning on creating niche sites and have been working on keyword research. I’m pretty excited about the idea actually.
I also have a lot of experience in fitness, so that will be an area I will be delving into as well.
Although I have been a financial planner for 9 years, I have little interest in it. I will be writing about it to the extent that I can teach people what I know, but I have no intention of trying to monetize that area.
Good ideas though, I appreciate it.
Julie-Ann
Hi Steve,
First of all sorry to hear you got your queens cracked on the river. Hate it when that happens! I am a big poker fan and LOVE the game!
I also LOVE your post, I am new to blogging also, so new infact that I haven’t published a blog post yet! But I am getting my business strategy sorted in my head and drawing up some outlines to my opt in offer and the information products I am going to create.
My website is based on what you talk about – life transformation, improving all the areas of your life. I have also been fine tuning my own goal achievement system that I will be writing about.
A couple of years ago I felt stuck, and dissatisfied with life in general, and now I have never been so happy. It is amazing to me to look at how far I have come, but it is even more amazing to me how much I have an insane belief in myself to manifest my future goals. I love it, after years of struggling and writing the same goals over the over again, now I feel excited when I write a goal because I just know it is GOING to happen.
I am really looking forward to seeing how your transformation goes, I think this approach of being brutally honest is brilliant. I wish you every success.
Hope to get to know you more in the months ahead.
Julz π
Steve
Julie-Ann,
Yea, I could play poker all day every day I think. I just don’t have the temperament though, I get too pissed off at other players π
Your blog looks interesting so far..at least your About page does.. I also like the Tweet you up have that’s like 250 days old!
Awesome to hear that you made such a HUGE shift in your life. My question is how?? I’d love to hear about it.
Thanks for following along and for your support.
See you around π
Julie-Ann
LOL! Yeah I came up with the idea when I was pregnant so grabbed the domain name and twitter name, I had a baby in June, so only getting round to making progress with the blog now! I also have an e-commerce website & a baby, so that keeps me busy!
I actually met my husband at a poker table, we love playing poker, we got married in Ireland and went to Las Vegas for 3 weeks for our honeymoon and played in some WSOP events. My husband is really good!! Im just waiting for him to win a big tournament! The sooner the better! HA!
For me the big shift happened when we got engaged to get married, we only had 6 months to do everything, and I got made redundant a month after we got engaged, so I started working online full time. I was focused on how much money I needed to make every day. I had the daily sales figure printed out and stuck to every wall in my house!! I just focused on it SO MUCH, I didnt do anything unless it would generate me money. I also had a wedding to plan, and 30 pounds to lose, and a few other personal goals. Its just a matter of knowing EXACTLY what you want in every area of your life, and then taking ACTION every day, dont let any problems, challenges, lack of information, doubt, fear, you just dont let anything stop you. Soon the momentum will build and you will just get a buzz and it will become so easy.
I could write all night on this topic it is the topic I am most passionate about!!
Also when you start and you build up a positive energy GOOD THINGS HAPPEN TO YOU, and things/people will appear to help you on your way.
Stay focused on WHAT REALLY MATTERS and FEEL BLESSED for every single tiny wee thing that happens to you, the more you feel blessed and appreciate everything that life has to offer, the more life will give you.
You have a good blog here! I have a really good feeling that things are going to work out so good for you and you will be looking back soon saying “wow!”
Go for it π
Julz!!!
Duncan gillespie
hi steve
I agree with jules i love the way this is developing .keep asking yourself the hard questions, which is actually the easy part its answering them that can be hard it really makes you think. I think you have already chosen the direction for this blog and your life.
I will be watching to make sure you dont go of track who knows if I see some changes in you i might even make some my self.
Steve
Duncan,
I agree. Asking the questions is easy. Taking the time to answer them honestly is very challenging. Thanks for keeping an eye out for me π
Glenn
Steve, I’ve been listening to your podcast for about a week now since Anna Hoffman posted about your interview with Penelope. I haven’t listened to that interview yet: I’m listening from the first to the latest, and I’m on #12 of 22. I wanted to wait until I had listened to all before contacting you, but I decided to check out your blog this morning, read this post, and felt compelled to chime in.
First of all, YOU GO, MAN! Congratulations on getting to this point without giving up despite results you have no doubt found disappointing. Your openness and honesty about where you are have been helpful for me, and I’m sure are helpful to many. Your passion and desire and willingness to act in big ways will move you along toward where you want to be. This time in your life is a critical pivot point, and it sounds to me like you’re determined to make the most of it.
Hang in there, keep fighting the good fight, and know that you have one more person in your corner. Thanks again for the blog and podcast. Have a great day!
Steve
Glenn,
Wow, you are listening to them all! That’s quite a wonderful compliment. Hopefully you are finding useful information thus far..
Although I have no results as far as income, I feel like my results have been good. I’m building something, I’m inspiring people, and I’m having a great time. Now it’s time to add the income piece. I’ve never considered quitting although I certainly have been frustrated and depressed at times.
Thanks for your support, I really appreciate it!
Armand Polanski
Hey Steve,
I always wanted to go to Vegas, experience the slot machines and tour the whole city but as of now I chose to focus on more important things.
Thank you very much for being honest with yourself, Steve. I appreciate people who share there true self in every post and in some way I feel as though I connected with you.
Right now in my life, I’m in point of choosing one career path and like you I am beginning to feel the pressure of choosing and committing.
All my life, I was just playing around and going along but to switch from a happy go lucky person to someone who actually produces result and like what you said it is the main motivation or purpose in life that will help you conquer discomfort of having a drastic change in your life.
Thank you very much for consistently producing amazing post, Steve!
Stay Awesome!
Armand Polanski
Adrienne
Bravo Steve, I’m so happy to see you finally “getting it”.
I’ve said this numerous times but will repeat it once again. I have all the faith in the world in you and know that “if” and I mean “if” you put your mind to something, you can accomplish it. You just have to do it and want it bad enough to follow through.
It just sounds like your journey so far has been kind of all over the place. Not knowing what you really want, not being consistent with your actions and not even knowing what those actions need to be. I can’t wait until you decide what you really want to do to build your own business. I have no doubt that with all these struggles you’ve gone through, that you are really going to be able to help others realize that they can do it as well.
Great share and I always love to hear from you. Thanks for being so honest with us.
We’ll talk very soon.
~Adrienne
Harleena Singh
Hi Steve,
That was truly a beautiful post, kind of a self-revelation!
Glad you are back from your trip and hope you had an enjoyable one as well. Life is strange with its twists and turns and each one of us has a story to tell. We all have somewhere or the other faced the situations you may have faced once, but we do learn to overcome those through our hidden strengths and powers that lie within us- they just need to be tapped.
Have the hope and keep the faith, and all is surely going to turn out wonderful. Wishing you all the very best π
Eric Johnson MBA
Steve!
Great post. (I actually live in Vegas! – but it’s north LV so it’s not so distracting)
Hobbyist owner to business owner. WOW. I hear you. I got slapped in the face with that a few months ago. There’s all the emotions, the questions and such….but at the end of the day, I decided to be a business owner. Do I want my clients to get hobbyist results or business owner results? That is motivating to me.
Fears – Yep! I’ve talked with several people about this. Owning a business is like confronting all of your fears fueled by Red Bull every single day. Will they trust me? Can I do this? Am I playing my best game? Is my content great? Someone told me that starting and growing your business is like getting a Ph.D in personal development. I agree.
Congratulations on your growth and insights! I love your blog and hope we can connect sometime.
Eric
http://www.finishyourproject.com
http://www.facebook.com/finishyourproject
Steve
Eric,
If I lived anywhere LV it would be a nightmare. I LOVE to gamble and don’t have the money. Bad combination..
It definitely looks like you’ve got a lot going on with your site. Glad to see you are taking it seriously and created a business from it.
Red Bull-now you’re speaking my language! I’m a hopeless addict and have been for years.
Anyway, thanks for stopping by and hopefully we’ll have a chance to chat sometime soon.
Steve
I did raise $10 pre flop on a $2-$4 NL game. Sucker was in the big blind and called anyway. He had a straight draw after the flop and called my all the way down. Like Phil Hellmuth says “if it weren’t for luck, I’d win every hand”.
If I’ve pissed you off and gotten your emotions working, that’s good. You’ve got a lot going for you and I’d love to see you step shit up a notch.
And yes, my life is very stressful, but it might not be for someone else. If all else fails, you will always have a job on Jersey Shore…
Steve
A $10 bet pre-flop makes the BB call $6. With 10-6 off, I’d fold it. I bet after the turn and river. Anyway, it pisses me off when that shit happens.
Looking forward to seeing some fireworks over on your blog soon!
Steve Rice
We definitely do care and connect so much more to this “new” you. You’re in the growing pains stage (remember those as a teen?). Hang in there. We’re with you in this.
Steve
Steve,
I think I am going to lose a lot of readers who came to read my guest posts and/or to read my anti-job rants, but I know I need to do this for me. Like I wrote, my life will not be significantly improved just by quitting my job. It will actually be more stresssful becasue my wife will be freaking out about not having a stable income. I have to move forward with my life and become a better person and my wish is that I can turn my journey into a very valuable resource for people and create a full time income.
We shall see my friend…
Jimmy
Hi Steve,
I guess you are still doing some deep soul searching about your life and purpose. There are tons of reading out there helping you clarify your meaning, but until you start taking the journey, you ain’t going to find it.
Fear is also part of this process. We were never meant to experience discomfort and fear is something created to keep us right there in our comfort zones. But then again, many people who are successful have no qualms about striking it out despite fear. I think you will strike out of this fear soon.
You mentioned about some form of family distress. Hey, I am in the same boat as you. Sometimes, I do not envy going back too because of all the stress and all, but the only thing keeping me afloat is my responsibility. This is something I cannot abandon ship on. I trust that you have similar values too.
Keep digging and doing.
Steve
Jimmy,
I’ve been spending most of my time reading and writing about my purpose and goals. I’m still overwhelmed by everything that’s going on and my time is so limited that I’m getting frustrated.
I’ve got plenty of fear and I understand that until I take that fear head on, it will always be holding me back.
Life is just so complicated and difficult and I know there is a better way. I need to find that way.
Hector Avellaneda
Steve – so glad about the change in the mindset brother! If you remember a while back a sent you the article on Start with Why. Well, it was inspired by Mr Simon Sinek himself. In fact, I was inspired to write it after I read his book.
I would highly, highly encourage you to read his book. It goes much deeper into that WHY, WHAT and HOW.
I am also taking a course by Simon himself on Discovering my WHY!
It’s awesome and O am loving it!
Anyway, really happy to hear about the change in mindset. It’s all about living in abundance and prosperity. I believe that when you truly believe in those 2 things you can start attracting them into your life in one way or another.
PS: Glad you had a break and time to reflect in Vegas!
Steve
Hector,
I had never heard of Simon before someone sent me a video clip. Seems to be a good person to learn from. I’ll definitely have to check out his book. What’s his course like? That sounds fascinating!
I’ve still got a long way to go and have a lot to learn, but I am making changes (hopefully) in the right direction.
Hector Avellaneda
Oh!!! One more thing! Almost forgot!
The same thing happened to me last year on m way back from Vegas! The turbulence was so bad, I was clenching the seat. The fct that the air attendants were running back and forth and were told to sit down on 3 different occasions byt eh pilots, did not help.
When we finally landed my wife pointed out that my underarms were soaked! I was embarrassed but that had to have been the worse flight ever!
Deeone
Great to see you enjoyed your trip for the most part buddy! I know a little getaway does the mind good every now and then.
I haven’t actually had a vacation in about 2 years, and the last time that happened, we went to my partner’s mom house for Thanksgiving. NOT A VACATION AT ALL! LOL π
Anywho, of course I care man. You already know, man! Sounds like you’re about your business though! That’s good to hear man! Wishing you the best bud! Most definitely!
Great rest of the week to ya!
Steve
Thanksgiving at your partners house…yea, that doesn’t sound like a terribly exciting time π
Thanks for all the support you’ve given me here, man. It’s awesome having you around!
Anant
Hey Steve! Hello from Singapore π I’d meant to comment on the Penelope Trunk post but life got in the way. It was pretty painful to listen to.
I came across your podcast on iTunes abt a month ago and that brought me your blog. You come across as a real nice, down to earth guy who just wants something better for his family and himself. That’s why I love this site and that’s why it was particularly painful to hear you get ripped apart by Penelope. And I couldnt answer some of her questions myself. It was as big a wakeup call to me as it was for you!
Anyway I’m glad you’re back and you’re taking this positively. I’m rooting for you man! You’ve certainly got my support π
Steve
Thanks Anant,
Thanks for listening to the interview, I appreciate it.
I do like to think of myself as being a pretty normal down to earth dude and my family is #1 for me for sure. My daughters are my world!
As painful as it was for you to hear, I wasn’t feeling bad about it. I was really shocked by what happened and didn’t have a lot of great responses for her because of it, but I’m thankful that it happened that way.
I hope to see you around more often!!
Jayne Kopp
Steve… WOW that was an incredible post. I had not read it before tonight.
I forgot to mention to you earlier, that these ‘growing stages’ and making changes are very tough. In fact they can be quite emotional. I remember having a darn good cry because I felt like I was an elastic band stretched to the max and not sure what direction to fly when the ends let go.
I think thats a good thing because it means you are on the right track. Changes that are painful are worthwhile once you’ve crawled through the confusion.
I hope we get chance to chat again… I was not as clear in my thoughts as I was the other day… I have been booked solid as well as running like a mad woman.
I was also wondering two things. One I forgot to ask you… and that is how do you make a podcast? I have never done it and could use a suggestion since you have it licked.
Secondly, did you know I nominated you for the Versatile Blogger Award? π
I forgot to ask if you had noticed.
I will shoot you an email tomorrow.
Jayne
Steve
Thanks Jayne!
I am definitely experiencing a number of emotions as I try to uncover some things about myself. I am someone who loves to stay deep in their comfort zone and making big changes in my life is very tough. I know I need to make many shifts in the way I think and the actions I take,but I struggle every day with this. I also know there is no growth through struggle.
It was great talking with you the other day and I appreciate your time π I’m sure will speak again soon.
I’d be happy to share what I know about Podcasting with you.
And yes, I did see the award. I appreciate that but I wasn’t sure if I was supposed to do anything about it…
Susan
I like everything you said here, it’s good stuff. I may be reading between the lines too much, but I’m curious if you’ve ever read Salty Droid. Whether you agree with him or think everything said is BS, you should really consider looking at some of his entries on internet marketers and the who’s who of people who make money online. Dave Navarro being one. It will give you perspective for sure on a few things.
Just a thought. This in no way my discounting the awesome clarity you’ve gotten and next steps. Good luck!
Steve
Susan,
I have read Salty Droid and I’m totally turned off by him. I got caught up a little in the whole Dave Navarro divorce/Naomi Dunsford thing and it was a mess! To be honest, I’m not a big Brian Clark/Darren Rowse fan. I think they do good work and are very successful, but it’s not my cup of tea. I don’t like SD for bashing them to bits like he does. I don’t think they are liars or cheats or anything like that.
And as far as Dave N, he has some awesome products and I purchased all his video trainings. He knows his stuff!
Patrick
Hi Steve, I haven’t been here for awhile, just read this and the two previous posts, and all I can say is wow. These posts have blown me away with their honesty and inspiration.
I’m rooting for you buddy; if I can help in any way I will, and it would give me great pleasure to know that I contributed to your success in some small way.
Steve
Hey Patrick,
Thanks for stopping by. I appreciate your offer to help and you never know, I might just ask for it….
Hope things are good with you.